Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Snicky du Jour: Super Bowl Webb

Since the soon-to-be-ex-Mrs-A.J.-McCarron is approaching about 14:30 on her "15 Minutes of Fame Clock", I figured I'd give her one more featured set here. Enjoy. She'll be a "what was her name...." soon.



Poll: Favre Thaw?


survey services


Tuesday, February 5, 2013

The Night The Lights Went Out In Vegas

Sooo... since we're talking ODD blackouts at sports events these days, let's all go back to one involving a possible bit of point spread shenanigans.

Septmber 5th, 2002.

Wisconsin Badgers at University of Nevada, Las Vegas.

Sam Boyd Stadium.

Thousands of drunken BAEDDDGer fans in town, betting like crazy on their team. Game is an easy cover for Wisky... the the lights go out just 2:41 until the game is "official" in the Vegas books.

We pick up the story, as written by Mark Anderson of the Las Vegas Review-Journal.

Of course, the power outage sparked conspiracy theories, some of which exist today.

Much of the suspicion is due to the heavy betting from the many Badgers fans who made the trip and pushed the spread from between 3 and 4 points to 7 for their favorite team.

When the lights went out, 7:41 remained in the game -- 2:41 away from making it an official result for the sports books. Thus, the Wisconsin fans who put money on their team to cover did not get paid winnings, but were simply refunded whatever they bet.

Major sports books would have lost only between $10,000 and $20,000 on the game, according to a Review-Journal article at the time. Their losses would have been offset largely because Badgers fans also pushed the total from 53 to 58 points.

'It surely wouldn't have gone over the total, and I'm sure there was a lot of parlay action on the total," said Ken White, chief oddsmaker for Las Vegas Sports Consultants.

Local radio co-host and noted sports bettor Dave Cokin said the theories amaze him.

"There's no way to keep a secret anymore," Cokin said. "It's why local politicians go to jail. So if it was some conspiracy with the UNLV-Wisconsin game, I think someone would've blown the whistle and made a lot of money. It's impossible. It's completely illogical and as stupid as someone believing in a curse on the Red Sox.

"There is no grassy knoll involved."

The early report by UNLV Police of a car hitting a transformer that was later discredited probably increased suspicions.

Sam Boyd Stadium manager Jeff Chalfant said an older cable that was part of "the main Nevada Power feed" burned out. That cable, he said, "burned through another."

And suddenly the stadium went dark.


Okay, let's finely tune the bullshit meter here.

1. Would there have been "motive" to pull the plug. Absolutely.

2. Opportunity? Yes, it's Vegas.

3. So what if OVERALL the sports books in Vegas would have only lost a paltry $10-20K? It doesn't mean that PERHAPS a prominent local Vegas "whale" might have had $200,000 on the hometown Rebels. HE would have a huge incentive to make that game "go dark."

And yes, the police report which was wrong, only adds suspicion. "One cable burned through another?" Do we have pictures of that? Was there a fire? What about backup systems?

Power surges, blackouts and failures happen. I get it. But they are quite rare when it comes to the THOUSANDS of major college and pro sporting events around the country, year after year, after year.

And there is also a misconception, that because a stadium has these BRIGHT LIGHTS that it must be a huge energy hog! Well, to some extent yes. But outdoor stadiums that have limited HVAC units, I bet use less juice than a typical mid-size office building or even an ice rink, or Costco.

Once things start adding up to being very, very fishy. Then get your noses out of your ass, and start sniffin.'


Mopping Up the Mantei T'eo Story

So this got lost in the mix for the most part, last week. Be it from story fatigue, the impending Super Bowl, or  perhaps the bullshit hounds losing a strong scent on the trail to figuring it all out.

The hoax mastermind, Roniahah "I've Eaten Through A Lot of My Issues Lately" Tuiasasopo came "clean" to Dr. Phil about how he pulled it all off.

Well, sorta clean.

When asked to "do the voice" that Ronaiah purports to have produced HIMSELF as the voice of Lennay Kukua for MORE THAN THREE YEARS, at first Ronaiah balked.

Then he agreed to do it in "Part 2" of the interview. (Cha-ching, ratings hook!)

Then he only did it behind a "screen" and not on camera.



Whatever.

Voice experts claim the wave form matches. So I guess he's "in the clear" on that front. Sort of. I still think it would be GRUELING to keep that up for so long, and to never once slip out of character. Plus, he's gotta think and talk like a girl - ABOUT EVERYTHING!

I think the story has now settled deep into the silty bottom of "Who the Fuck Exactly Knows Lake" and it will take something unusual to ultimately recover the "full truth."

Mantei will be at the combines this month. There will be more questions. More media coverage. I bet however, he has a good set of defensive, evasive, say nothing-lets-move-on answers ready to go.

Consider me placing this one in the "cold case" file. Not closed, just cold for now.

Snicky du Jour: Katie Couric























Oh Katherine, you naughty devilish 50-something!





Monday, February 4, 2013

Poll: Blackout Blame Game


survey service


"What's Your Deal?"

So I find this incredible to say, but here goes: maybe Pete Carroll was right when he asked Jim Harbaugh: "What's your deal?"

At the time, I dismissed it as sore-ass-loser Pete Carroll, who got humiliated by a conference opponent at home, while sitting as a Top-10 team with a future first round QB.

But then last night, after the Harbowl, Jim and John shake hands. It goes something like this...

John: "I love you."
Jim: "Congratulations...."

Really? REALLY. And look at the awkward, arms-length, do NOT BRO HUG ME MAN BECAUSE WE ARE BROTHERS IN DNA ONLY, handshake and chest pat, cheek pat exchange.

Honestly, Jim. What IS your deal?

Blackout Culprit Found!

This guy!

*I think.....

Catchable

I still don't quite know exactly where I stand on the  most infamous "non-call" in Super Bowl history.

But I know this: do NOT call that ball "un-catchable."

No, no. NO sir. Very, very, catchable. In fact, might have been another PERFECT throw from the kid.

Sunday, February 3, 2013


Here are our Top Prime Time Prognosticators’ Predictions:

Mark Benz       SF 23   BAL 17 DaveBertsch     SF 20 BAL 17 Randy Dean SF 22   BAL 30 Scott Heian SF 24   BAL  27 MikeHoffman     SF 14 BAL 24 Daryl Wenzl        SF 24   BAL 17

Czabe’s Super Scoring Criteria: If no one picks the exact score.  The winner will be determined from the following criteria: A. The players who at least picked the right winner, and the player that came closest to the winners score without going over, if there is a tie, B. The next tiebreaker is the player getting closest to the losers score without going over, if we are still tied, C. The final tie breaker is a coin flip. Good Luck Prime Time Prognosticators, but remember just like in Highland... There can be only 1...

King of PrimeTime

Friday, February 1, 2013

Poll: Super Bowl Party Parasites





The Glutton
This guy sees your elaborate spread of food and thinks: "I'm going to take this entire thing down!"

The Gambler
The guy who rocks back and forth nervously, only to punctuate the room with loud angry expletives at random moments, likely due to heavy prop bets  or obscure over/unders.

The Armchair GM
This guy doesn't like a single player on the field for either team, and relishes trying to tell you how only he can spot said player's deficiencies.

The Guy Who Knows Just Enough to Be Dangerous
This guy blurts out half-true things that lead to awkward moments where you think about helping to correct him, only to give up because it would be pointless. Example: "I love how the Harbaugh brothers are twins. I think that's so cool."

The Seat Hogger
This guy takes his place in the perfect "A" position at least 1 hour before kickoff, and NEVER moves, fearing any periphery movement as a possible sneak assault on his couch spot.

The Careless Dad
This guy has two kids with him that run roughshod through the host's house, without any corrective parenting from pops. A guy who is likely a combination of all of the above.

Snicky: Nicole Zaloumis

If you don't know her already, get with it people.

The NFL's TV morning show is... eh... I suppose. A few too many taking heads, and none of them particularly compelling, but I appreciate that they are out there trying to offer us something - anything - other than the usual Bristol-fed predictable television gruel.

The front-woman, Ms. Zaloumis, appears a bit too "serious" on the show for my likes. But I understand what she fights in the business as a tendency by viewers to "ditz-i-fy" any good looking woman on a sports show.

So it was nice to see her do some "Dancing With the Guests" this week... and BAM! Are you kidding me? Nicole just isn't skinny, she's a wonderfully muscular hardbody!

You go, girl. Well... done.




"Don't Be No Cloud on a Sunny Day, Mon!"



Hilarious.

And course, for the professionally offended: "horrific."
“It’s pretty horrific,” says Ricki Fairley-Brown, president of the multicultural marketing agency Dove Marketing. “Why do they have a white guy from Minnesota faking a Jamaican accent?” 
Even more troubled by the spot is Rochelle Newman-Carrasco, chief hispanic marketing strategist at Walton Isaacson, an African-American, Gay/Lesbian and Hispanic agency. “What happens in this ad is that the culture becomes a punch line, and that is offensive.” 
Pop cultural guru Barbara Lippert is not amused, either. “It made me uncomfortable to see all of those white people in an office setting doing this,” she says. “I found it offensive.”
They are still booing black soccer players in Europe, for God's sake! And here, we're worried about... this. And the "Rooney Rule."

If this is the state of legitimate conversation in America - the MOST open, free, multi-cultural, multi-racial, multi-religious, and progressive minded country in the world - then we are doomed.

Doomed.

Prepare For Humiliation

This, is the essence of sports. Period. Read the full edict here. I present the abridged version below.

As you can see from the calendar, the game is coming up this weekend. I'm sure you are as excited for it as I am, as our cities are rivals and have been for quite some time. Your confidence in your team is high, but rest assured, you will suffer humiliation when the sports team from my area defeats the sports team from your area.

When the sporting contest begins, the players on your team will be treated as though they are inconsequential. It will be remarkably easy for my team to accumulate more points than yours. There are many reasons for this, starting with the inferior physical attributes of the players representing your area. Strength, speed, and agility are just three of the qualities that the players on the team from your area lack. The players representing my area, on the other hand, have these traits in abundance.

Underscoring your team's inferiority is its choice of colors. It is ludicrous to believe that your team's colors inspire either respect or fear. Instead, they appear to have been chosen by someone who is colorblind or, perhaps, bereft of sight altogether.

One of the more pathetic aspects of the team from your area is the fact that only people in your immediate area possess an affinity for it. By means of contrast, the team from my area inspires loyalty and affection in individuals who live in many other geographic locations.

Do you still doubt that the team from your area is inferior to the one from mine? Just look at our teams' respective histories. In the past, we have defeated you on any number of occasions. Granted, there were times when your team beat my team, but those were lucky flukes.

The day of the game will soon be at hand. And no matter how hard you pray to a higher power or how many foam accoutrements you wear in support of the team from your area, your team will be defeated. We will win and you will lose. This is your fate.

Prepare for humiliation. It shall be upon you at the designated hour.