"It's A High, High, High.... Can of Corn!"

Very much looking forward to the 17th annual Bob and Brian Open golf tournament on August 7th at Silver Spring CC in Menomonee Falls, WI.

As you may remember, I once stupidly bragged that I could successfully kick 5 out of 10 penalty kicks past a world class soccer goalkeeper.

Fail. I hit 4. (Note: Was wearing hiking boots instead of soccer shoes. All I had for traction...)

This year, I was pondering the unique range at Silver Spring. A neat rectangular grid that stretches out 290 yards from the double-tiered tee area, down to a mammoth mesh monster of a fence to keep long hitters from terrorizing players down on the low lying holes beyond.

I wondered....

If I stood at the bottom with a baseball glove, could I successfully track and catch a 3-wood or driver from somebody up top?

Consistently?

Even once?

Might I DIE from a gruesome head wound on a mis-judged pop-up?

I mean, how hard can it be, right? It would only be the equivalent of an 870 foot baseball blast!

As you can see courtesy of the good folks at Google Maps, it would only be like catching a ball that has been hit clean out of Yankee Stadium, and half way to the Bronx.

Stay tuned, and make sure your team is entered this year. I'll see you there with a hard-hat on!

NFL Suspends Favre..... (Not).

From the "mmmmm... good point" Department....

From libertarian blogger/Frenemy of Czabe: Skip Oliva...

Random thought: Why doesn't Goodell suspend Brett Favre for the 2009 season? Clearly, Favre has repeatedly manipulated league procedures and a number of franchises for his own benefit to the detriment of the league's integrity. If, as Goodell and his media enablers maintain, the role of the commissioner is to act in the "interests of the game" -- whatever that means -- then he should intervene and put an end to Favre's fraudulent retirement-unretirement cycle. Suspend his ass now and force everyone to move on.

(No, of course I'm not serious, but if you're going to suspend players "indefinitely" for off-field acts, then I'd like to know why a player who has repeatedly tampered with multiple franchises gets a pass.)

REACT: I agree 100%. Favre has clearly manipulated the process to in effect gain un-deserved free agency. If the NFL were a fantasy league, people would be screaming. But since owners just care about cashing $$$$$, they look the other way. Just like when the Celtics got Garnett and the Lakers got Gasol, these were moves that would have disintegrated most fantasy leagues with their blatant unfairness. But since they were part of a larger leaguewide whoring out for money and ratings, they went unchecked. Wheeeee!

LPGA Tour Posts Job Opening

This just in...

BETHLEHEM, Pa. – The LPGA’s Board of Directors is actively seeking an interim commissioner from outside the organization to run its tour while the board launches a more thorough search for a successor to Carolyn Bivens, a tour player director said Sunday at the U.S. Women’s Open.

Alrightey-then!

Sign-me-up!

As one of just a handful of barely measurable men (or women) who now watch the LPGA Tour on a regular basis during the season, I think I have some ideas on how to keep the tour relevant.

And by "relevant" I mean... alive.

Ahem.

Look, getting back the SEVEN events that Bivens managed to burn to the ground with her heavy-handed-who-do-you-think-you-are approach, is going to take YEARS. But let's start with what we can start with.

1. All HD, all the time. Nothing is death quite like SD sports these days, so whatever costs incurred here, just write the check.

2. Ban long pants when the weather is 65 degrees and above. Oh, is that sexist? Sorry. It's not. It's just a dress code. The men don't get to wear shorts (or tank tops like the ladies) for a simple reason. It would look like crap. The PGA Tour believes in presenting a "professional" look. The LPGA needs the same. Androgynous short-haired women wearing parachute pant trousers in July in baseball caps ain't gonna cut it.

3. Limit the # of Players from a single country. Yeah, this IS targeted at South Korea, which now provides some 40% of the LPGA. Let's use that current 40% going forward. And if Sweden gets super-good, then they too would hit the wall at 40%, as would American players. You wanna call this racist? Go tell that to the Japanese baseball leagues and the Canadian Football leagues which limit foreign players.

4. Push the American stars like Paula Creamer (above) like crazy. Make no apologies. Get them on Dancing With the Stars, exhibition matches, and whatever else gets the names and faces into the pop culture bloodstream.

5. Know your place. At the end of whatever you do, you gotta remember you are a nice little "niche" league. Embrace the "mom and pop" aspects of the Tour and don't ever think you will approach PGA Tour rights fees, attendance, or prize money.

There. Now where do I send my resume?