King Clown Has His Day In The Sun

Apparently, to be named "Sportswriter of the Year" all you need is opposable thumbs, and a name that is slightly more well known than the hockey blogger at AOL Fanhouse.

Because Peter King, has been given that honor. King writes...

I'm a little bit blown away this morning, as I have been since Dave Goren of the National Sportscasters and Sportswriters Association called in January to say I'd been named sportswriter of the year. You sure you didn't get my number mixed up with Posnanski's or Reilly's or Verducci's? But hey, that's the power of Sports Illustrated, SI.com and the internet in today's sports communications business. And I ain't giving it back.

Tonight's the awards ceremony, in this small city an hour north of Charlotte. I'll have to take a deep breath when I look around and see those I've looked up to in the business, like Bob Ryan, Brent Musburger and Hal McCoy -- a guy who taught me so much on the Reds' beat 30 years ago -- and realize I'm standing with them now, and standing with peers like Mike Tirico and so many writers and broadcasters from across the country who I've shared press boxes with over the years. It's a great honor, something I'll never forget as long as I live.

Ah yes, an honor you so richly deserve, you witless stooge. Good work. In the very same MMQ "column" - proofread by live monkeys! - King managed to dither about for 300 odd words about AN INTERVIEW THAT NEVER HAPPENED!!!

Excuse me but, BWAH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! 

Nothing like having to CROSS OUT an entire chunk of your column, because you were TOO FUCKING LAZY to make one call on your vaunted cell phone - to either Sirius Radio (whom he fucking WORKS FOR part time!) or perhaps any number of your "high level" NFL contacts.

Nah. Just assume a random blogger you have never heard of, nailed the story, and USE IT as basis in fact, for off-the-cuff speculation over your Starbucks triple-latte.

Once more with feeling: what a fucking hack!

Enjoy the rubber chicken and accolades tonite, Pete.

Meanwhile, leave the heavy reporting to the real pros who will never share the stage with over-rated sports media princesses like you.